High School never ends...?

As I was driving home from school, a song "high school never ends" was blasting through the radio. This made me reminisce through the whole 15-minute drive home. The fact is, I really enjoyed my high school life. I still maintain regular contact with my high school bestfriends, occasionally meet during our free time, and even plan for future travels. On special occasions, and on holidays, we have an outing, reminiscent of high school outings--with the same faces. Some classmates, no matter the constant invite, never really show up, some show up once in a while, and some, like me, is always present on the occasion (LOL!). Make that few. I think I can only count about 5 of us who are always present. Well, we used to be the organizers years back. I guess that's our primary role. I keep thinking maybe I should be absent sometimes because come our grand reunion, I wouldn't really be amazed at the 10-year evolution of our classmates because I'm relatively updated annually. But then, I really enjoyed the company of these people that I really like going to these gatherings. In fact, I'm so looking forward to our 10-year reunion. That would be in 2011. My only concern is, I would be a PGI at that time, and I'm fervently praying that the officers won't schedule the reunion during my duty.

Bring it on!

If I maybe complaining about being the jinxed last post, well, notice the lag in the date. True enough, I was so busy I hadn't had time to blog. I don't care about compatibilities in the chakras anymore. Truth is, busy-hon na jud ko! Eversince surgery, OB, pedia, and presently in OB-NOPH...I think I'm the busiest in our group, if not in our whole class, rivaled only by my own duty-mates...haha! In other words, our duty group has been the busiest among the class, setting record-high admissions whichever department we're in. I was thinking, maybe we're only busy if we're apart, because for some reason, when the three of us are together, we're relatively not busy--whatever.

The only thing I can say for now is, I'm really enjoying my rotation in OB-NOPH (I do want to be an OBGYN). And yes, I also hold the record of highest admissions in our group, and in our class so far (Group C has not rotated yet). But I'm glad because this meant more cases, and more experiences. The one I particularly enjoyed was delivering my 3rd set of twins, because this was done vaginally, and I was the one who really delivered them (and not just as first-assist, as in cesarean sections). Since the second twin was breech in presentation, I was also able to do the Mauricio maneuver (I'm only the second in our class to do so, but I think I would get more credit since I delivered a live baby, unlike my classmate who did it on a case of fetal demise).

This being said, I'm really going to miss this present rotation. Tomorrow would be my last duty and I'm expecting a full 24-hours duty again (not a wink of sleep). But I say, bring it on!

Jinxed?

For the past 2 duties that I've had, I've been busy. More busy than usual. One duty-mate had recently just transferred to the other hospital. He had always been saying that we are his "lucky charms" because in our past duties, we are relatively hayahay... but then since he transferred, so has our luck changed. We are actually more busy now than the other 2 teams, a first since we started this clerkship in medicine. My other duty-mate kept on blaming me that I'm the busy one. So does that mean I'm jinxed? I have no other one to blame this to. Maybe because duty-mate one kept on barking about it. (woof, woof, woof). But I kept on thinking of other reasons like maybe the change of residents, the rescheduling of PGI duty to another schedule. Whatever, something's not right. I kept on thinking this goes way beyond the paranormal (?) and may involve the mixture or compatibility of our chakras that may be favorable or not to our present working environment, hence this results in patients gravitating towards the hospital in our duty days. (Ok, I admit I'm watching too much anime shows). But I'm almost backlogging on my responsibilities, I maybe becoming a resident JI in the Surgery Department (Darian was the resident JI in Medicine Department). However, on a positive note, this could probably mean I'm meant to be a surgeon in the future. :)

Clerkship

They didn't call the 4th year of medical school clerkship for nothing. As should be expected, a lot of writing takes place, hence called clerks. Since starting my clerkship (2 months PTE), I have already consumed almost 2 rims of bond paper, and countless ballpens.

But I'm not going to elaborate now about the differences between regular clerks and medical clerks. However, there are worthy things of note that each of us junior interns should basically know, and should master-- English grammar, and more importantly, SPELLING. This is the part whom most take for granted. Speaking is easy because even if the grammar is wrong, one is still able to pass the message across--and one doesn't have to worry about how words are spelled.

But the written documents, our histories and PE's, should be properly spelled, else, they would mean something else. The funny thing with this batch is that those words that tend to be misspelled are actually simple words encountered everyday. I have taken note of a few to remind myself not to be a victim of "spelling boos"...lol
auto sat
soar throat
bannana
pail nailbeds

Peace time

As I always say, I'm a peaceful person, because everytime I'm on duty, it is relatively 'peace time'. In fact, to prove yet this 'charm', I have composed these two entries while in the ER. Amazing right? And thank God for that!

Although, I would say right now that the reason nobody's going to the hospital is that they are at the park to watch the Kabulakan Festival of Dumaguete. :P

Preggy tales

In my previous duty at the ER,I didn't realize immediately that I was surrounded by moms and moms-to-be. Afterall, there were only about a couple of middle age women there. The others, I speculated to be around my age range, or at least, still in there 20's. 

It started when N1, who's actually tying the knot in less than 2 weeks, went for a pregnancy test. She was probably excited to start her family and the others became excited also on how it would turn out, even guessing by themselves the outcome based on N1's symptoms. 

There weren't a lot of patients that day and I was supposedly using my time to study but I couldn't help overhearing their tales on the road to motherhood.

There was N2, who was actually 4 months on the way. She was a smaller woman than me and about my age too. I didn't notice until they mentioned it. (Shocked! But I kept it to myself)

N3, who I remembered was actually a batchmate in college, already had a 2-year old child. (Ooohh...)

Then there was A1, who's already on her 40's, relating how she became a mother just a couple or so years ago.

I was probably the only 'single lady' in that room, and most definitely the least experienced when it comes to that thing. Good thing too they didn't start on bedroom tales and I might have to leave the room. (Heck, I haven't got any experience at all.) As it turned out, N1's result was negative. Aw. Maybe it was too soon.

Happy Puppets

There's a reason we call ourselves the Happy Puppets. I don't exactly remember how it came to be that we call ourselves that. All I do remember is that we encountered this term in Patho class, describing a group of individuals exhibiting a gene abnormality that makes the bearer look like the characteristic puppet.

For some bizarre reason, it stuck in our minds, and got to associating the term to our own group. With good reason. First of all, there have always been an air of cheery aura in our class. We almost always never get too depressed, because we know how to best manage it: go to our favorite videoke place!
Or pig out! Nothing better than food trip!
Or just stay in the car and ride around the city the whole night! O.B.T.! O.B.T.!

Eversince we started this scholastic journey, we have been infinitely compared to the previous batch. And more so since we are distinctly different. Maybe because the pressure is high on them, being the pioneering batch, while we can always find ways to get away with things, being less pressured as the second batch.

Someone recently commented "Lahi ra jud mo'g aura". She's referring to our attitudes during our clerkship. The first batch were full of complaints, tattletales and feelings bordering on giving up during the first few weeks of clerkship. We did hear about how they would cry due to stress, fatigue, humiliation, and all those "di ko na kaya" tagline.

Us? We laugh our way through. We seem to be always smiling, so they say. It's as if we have no worries at all. That's the Happy Puppets for you!

As for my part, I'm not dwelling on the negative stuff, but on the positive. In fact, I'm actually enjoying what I do. I got to appreciate more the cases that we have only been studying theoretically from the past 2 years of med school. Although, there were actually times that I even felt bored (?), even with all the work I have to do. Hmmm. Say what?

I belong

Eversince starting medical school, this is the first time that I truly feel one with the field. I really am enjoying what I do. It may be stressful at times, but maybe because more often than not, I am not a toxic person so I am able to truly enjoy what I do.

When we were still starting in med school, there were hard times (extra hard examinations where we all failed), and some of my classmates were keen on continuing despite that because this is "their calling". I haven't really felt that. It was more of a job that needs to be done, something that I had started and now oblige to finish, but never because I really wanted it. I did like it of course (problem: one of the many likes), not just with the same fervor as them, and it kind of bother me at times. At the back of my mind, I still really want to do something else. I take this as part of my journey in discovering my true calling, and I always see myself in the future doing something else. I was already counting the years, of when I can be done with this and start doing another stuff. As most of our professors would tell us, this is a lifelong profession. Now, how would I ever get out?

But just recently, I was doing what I was supposed to do for a Junior Intern, and not being toxicated by stress and overflowing histories and progress notes, I was truly able to appreciate what we are doing, and I felt that I am one with this place. I enjoyed the time that I am spending in the hospital, with my friends and even with the patients at times. I enjoy the fact that I am getting better with what I'm doing, learning lots of new stuff, and learning new techniques.

I always try to justify my feelings. So I said to myself, the main reason I'm already enjoying this internship is because I'm already getting the hang of things. I don't know with my other classmates, but now, I'm not so lost as I was a month ago. And like I said, I'm not a toxic person so I'm able to get into my own pace and be my own person. However, tomorrow we'll be starting another rotation, and only three of us will be left in the ward. Meaning, the bulk of the stress, divided into six, will now be divided to three only. But I'm still positive that I can do this, having this new enlightened heart. I only have my faith in God that He will deliver me from any of my difficulties.

Sleepy heads

Just some candid shots (more like stolen :P) from our first few days of junior internship.






Who got caught? the camera's still rolling...^ ^

Hungry Young Poet

Every time I feel inspired over an XY chromosome-related stuff, I feel the urge to write. My hopeless romantic side would kick in and I find myself stringing poetic (kuno) verses into paper. And it's not only the inspiration phase but everytime I feel a strong emotion towards the object of my affection. It could be the heartbreaking part that's intense enough to make me get a pen and paper and write.

I was recently inspired by XY, something I haven't really been in a long time. Something clicked in the corner of my mind and I suddenly recalled having a blank book where I write all those poems I had written since high school. It had been a long time indeed, for last I wrote was January 2005. Wow. Too long it has been. Just so in case my memory fails me, I always wrote in the back of the page who I'm referring to.

Having been reunited with this book, I reread some, trying to connect the feelings embodied in the poems to who I am right now. Well, this put things into perspective about time making me grow in numbers. ( I hope too, that my maturation level has grown as well)

A particular song immediately came to mind. "I remember the boy, but I don't remember the feeling anymore". LOL. I might remember the feeling, as expressed by my writings, but I feel so detached from them that I could only laugh from my own foolishness. But is it really foolish? At one point in time, I truly did feel those emotions. I might have exaggerated a bit to express my poetic freedom though.

So where was I in the last 4 years? Only two things:

First, I haven't found an inspiration in that time period.

Second, I had completely forgotten that I own this particular book.

It's more likely the first since if I had been inspired enough to write, then I would know where to write it. Like what happened now.

What's amazing was, the person I'm referring to in probably the last three entries I had 4 years ago, is the same person I'm referring to now.

Hmm. logically, it follows that throughout those years of searching, I still harbor affection for this person. Of course, I know I do. I should know right? I'm just not sure about the intensity of it, whether time had made it wax or wane.

It remains to be seen. Anything goes. But I got myself hoping again. Am I ready? I feel that I am.


**so? I am hungry. And of course still young! LOL**

Singapore Escapade

My three favorite words to describe Singapore is Clean, Disciplined and Expensive. There are other words to say, but these three about sums it up. The first two descriptions can also be coined into one word: FINE. Most souvenir T-shirts read Singapore is a Fine City. It can be understood as nice, pleasant, attractive or of high quality, but to Singapore, it means penalty. Singapore does have a reputation of imposing high fines for disobeying rules and regulations. But this made the city a clean and safe society. You can roam the streets in the middle of the night and still feel safe, like no one will touch you. And the transport system is also very organized. Traffic there is like no traffic here in the Philippines. However, living in such a society does have a price to pay. Cost of living is expensive, about two to three times the cost here in the Philippines. Regardless, there are good shopping districts in Singapore, where merchandise are sold about the same price if converted to the peso (Bugis, Chinatown, Orchard). And for an island-city state, there are lots of tourist destinations in SG. Due to constraints of time, I was only able to visit Sentosa island, the zoo and Night Safari, and the Marine Bay. This is to favor more time for shopping, which is relatively more enjoyable at times than sight-seeing. LOL. I'm only sorry I wasn't able to try the reverse bungee. Maybe next time. Oh yeah, I also wasn't able to take a picture of the Sentosa bus (crap!).

Testimonial Dinner

A tradition in the making, a testimonial dinner and bequeathal ceremony was held in our school last March 21 to celebrate the the graduation of the pioneering batch of the Silliman University Medical School (SUMS). It was a proud moment for the school to produce for the first time a set of graduates, and it was a sight to see all of our teachers getting so excited to be wearing their togas. The teachers were even more numerous than the graduates themselves.

The ceremony started with a pictorial session, followed by the devotion, with bequeathal of the white-coat, stethoscope, and candle from the seniors to us juniors, in preparation for our clerkship in April 1. In most part of the program, the seniors prepared video presentations and speeches about their 4-year experiences in the medical school--their most memorable experiences, most embarrassing moments (almost all mentioned being scolded by tatay for being late), most fond memories, and even what they want to be in ten years. They had an awarding for each graduate which best describes them and which they themselves created.

Here are a few pictures of the said event.

A Series of Unfortunate Events

No, this is not Lemony Snicket's but my own version of unfortunate events happening one after another. A month ago, my great-Aunt died. She was my grandmother's sister, and a second mother to my mom (my mom was actually led to believe she was her mother and sired by an American soldier, being a spinster herself. But that's another story to tell). So, she was very close to us, being the primary nanny to us siblings from the day we were born. She was apparently healthy in her 91 years, apart from the progressing dementia and had no previous complaints of any kind prior to the incident. After taking a bath that fateful Saturday, she experienced an epigastric pain, one that she would not admit to me despite her facial expression of pain and the obvious way she pressed her epigastric area. She kept spitting her saliva and I urged her to "sleep on it" (she had a history of ulcer 2 years prior). I had checked her vital signs and it didn't show any warning signs of impending doom. Nonetheless, after about an hour or so, my brother found her on her bed lifeless. We immediately brought her to the hospital though it was permanent (she was diagnosed of AMI--shucks! how could I miss it? And I call myself a medical student. I feel so inadequate, I should have considered that in the differentials). But she lived a good 91 years so it was not too hard to accept. It was bound to happen sometime. And she was lucky she had a quick and graceful exit. That brings a total to 3 living survivors of the 9 siblings of the Dael clan. A few days after her burial, her brother woke up, having difficulty in moving his body. The day before, he had been apparently healthy, going about in his tricycle, but had exhausted himself chasing after Chippy, the dog, who got loose from his chains. He was immediately brought to the hospital and was suspected of having a stroke. But it was ruled out as his symptoms were not really consistent with stroke. A few hours later, he had difficulty of breathing and was rushed to the ICU for ventilatory support. We later found out he had Guillain-Barre Syndrome, a rare disease that struck once every million persons (if this was a lottery, then my great-uncle is indeed lucky). He had never been hospitalized all his life but made up for it now, as his medicines are so expensive (8K x 8 x 5 = 320K). Anyway, this is another major blow to our family, afterall, his sister just died, I don't know how we can cope up with another death so soon. Fortunately, this disease is curable but he is 79 afterall, anything can happen (good thing now he is recuperating slowly, but he still needs the respirator though, so he's still in the ICU). A few days after this happened, a news came that would shatter my dreams. We have a school activity scheduled on the 21st. Originally, 3 of my classmates and I had planned a short trip to Singapore before we embark on our duties as clerks. We were scheduled to leave on the 20th. It would have been an easy decision--be absent on the 21st. BUT, our dean made this event a formal testimonial dinner/bequeathal and it is mandatory that we attend, or else we can not proceed to clerkship (*CRASH! there goes our hopes and dreams...) It was our finals week and it was so hard to study with this bothering our minds. Our plane tickets were nonrefundable, nonreroute-table and non transferable...how to solve? I checked with the airlines on the internet and there were no available seats for subsequent flights (*pouring my eyes out at this moment). We had a talk with our dean if it is possible to reschedule the said event however, the dean's schedule is also tight. If you think things could not possibly go worse, that afternoon, my mom messaged me and she was frantic. She said our mango tree cracked in half, and the smaller branch fell to the road, disabling the vehicles to pass. CRAP! I love that mango tree. I used to climb it for fruits when I was little, actually, even up to now, if my father doesn't find out. I felt like my spirit just left me. How could these things happen? I told my friends and one said, it's my own series of unfortunate events. Another said, when it rains it pours and right now, bad luck is pouring on me, but then, maybe, a string of good luck may follow it. I was depressed for maybe a couple of days. My intuitive mother bought me a half gallon of ice cream to cheer me up. And then I received a comment on FB that basically made my day. I was suddenly feeling optimistic. My classmates and I went to check again with the airlines, this time in their office and we manage to rebook our flight (though with 8K additional fee). I thank God that I'm an optimistic and cheerful kind of person. I refused to let it affect me because one, i have a lot more to be thankful for; two, I have a great family and great friends who support me; three, I'm in good health; four, I have good grades and five, everything is manageable.

Life's Comedy

I have this notion that comedies in the Middle Ages are those that usually end in tragedy. I googled this and found out I'm actually wrong. A Shakespearean comedy is one that has a happy ending, usually involving marriages between the unmarried characters, and a tone and style that is more light-hearted than Shakespeare's other plays. However, Shakespear did have an unusual tone of mixing humour and tragedy (tragicomic) hence it stuck in my mind that his comedies end in tragedy.

Two weeks ago, I encountered a case which brought Shakespearean comedy to my mind. One of my great-Uncle's neighbors in the ICU had a constant stream of visitors, teachers, who were past colleagues of my mother (now retired). As it happened, an elementary school teacher had been reprimanded by the principal for losing a sum of money from the PTA (about 9K). This incident actually happened two years back. The principal, being new to that school had dug up this inconsistency with the treasury and confronted the teacher. She demanded that the teacher own up the fault of using the money illegally, one that the teacher vehemently denied. She was "fooled" by a parent in a bank, who offered to deposit the money for her (budol-budol daw). This incident, happening two years previously, had gone unnoticed by the previous administration. Fast forward to the present, this teacher was accused and humiliated by the principal of something that she believes, is not her outright fault. She was greatly distressed. This woman is a timid, serious, and relatively protected from the cruelties of the world by six overbearing older siblings. She's never really experienced being reprimanded or humiliated so. And, having experienced what had happened, she can not handle it. As the story goes, that evening, she accompanied her husband to the grocery, something she doesn't usually do and picked up a bottle of muriatic acid to clean up the toilet. (Her husband actually encouraged her...yes dear, the toilet needs cleaning up). Unbeknownst to the husband, the teacher already had a plan. She wrote several suicidal notes to her family and colleagues, and even to the main culprit, the principal. She had every intention of ending her life.

Relating this story as sanely as I can muster, you can hardly grasp the dramatic intensity of what happened. Yes, it is a tragedy that this woman would feel this way after being wrongfully accused over a mere 9 thousand pesos to the point of ending her own life. If you have been carefully following my story, you would then ask, "so she was in the ICU...was she saved, afterall?" ...hmmm, tricky question. Long story short, NO, she wasn't saved. She died after 1 week in the ICU.

But that's not the reason why I wrote about this, and exclaimed it to be life's comedy. The thing that I found really funny with this story is that after concreting the idea of suicide, the teacher then proceeded to the CR to do the deed. She poured muriatic acid on a glass and drank more than half of it. What was really funny was, after drinking this corrosive liquid, the teacher realized that it was painful to the stomach (really? *rolls eyes* and I thought she wanted to kill herself). She could not bear the pain so she went to her sister in the next house and asked to be brought to the hospital because of stomach pains. How ironic!

(You know, it's hard to sympathize with people like this. They actually seal their own fate. As my cousin would put it, we would not fall under the same incident coz we were so used to being scolded--iron skins! LOL)

Best Buy

I know it's been long overdue, I should have written about this a long time ago but it's better late than never right?

So, 3 months ago, in our FGL in HongKong, it was a shopping rendezvous and the 4 days we stayed there wasn't really enough to cover all of HK's shopping districts (and a good thing too because I had already depleted most of my life's savings on this trip). But of all the things that we had bought, this one, a kaleidoscope, stands out as the best buy. Actually, I wasn't very sold out on this at first. I mean, I've had kaleidoscopes before when I was little. We can always buy one in good ol' Philippines. But Joy insisted we should all get one as it's the best one of the lot. In the end, I did bought one, except Esmot who wasn't really swayed (she bought Buddha's instead--LOL).

And the satisfaction was irreplaceable. Right after a tiring day of sight-seeing ang shopping,
there's no better bonding moment than sitting in the park and observing the city lights under the minute lens of the kaleidoscope, the quiet night ringing with our peals of laughter. Thanks girls!

Patient-Doctor 3: Case Presentation

Our exposure to this patient was first met with apprehension. Afterall, the patient has a potentially infectious disease eventhough she is undergoing treatment. But when I first saw Cathrina, I thought she is beautiful and it is unfortunate how she had acquired pulmonary tuberculosis. She was reserved around us, but became more sociable in our subsequent visit to her home.

In our first visit to their house, we interviewed the mother underneath a guava tree outside their door. It was near dusk and the house didn't have any electricity. Cat-Cat was playing with the neighborhood children, who are also her relatives. However, she shied away from us, so we contented with getting information from her mother about their family.

The family's sole breadwinner is the father, whom, unfortunately, we didn't get the chance to interview. He is a welder and doesn't have a permanent employer. He is constantly out of the house for work. With 4 children, his daily wage often is just enough to get the family through the next day. And the mother is strictly a housewife. It would have been better if she found ways to augment the family income, and improve their living condition.

On our second visit, we were able to observe inside their house, which consisted of a living room, one bedroom, where they all sleep beside each other, a kitchen and a small toilet. It was very pitiful to see, especially since it was raining hard that day and their roof, made of nipa had holes in it.

I'm not sure if they are contented with their way of life, or has simply accepted that they were not blessed financially. The children are also still young to help, although the eldest, being 15 years old, can already help out. They have a pitiful condition, but not one which they cannot overcome if they really want to.